There is a certain student that attends my institution of higher learning who stands out. The reason for this is he has what I have come to call “Hot Japanese Hair.” I happen to know that this student is, in fact, a native of Japan, and his awesome, colorful, gravity-defying Mohawk-like do’ is something only a Japanese guy could pull off. I saw him quite often last semester and have seen him this semester as well. There appears to be a certain wall that will crumble if he does not support it, and so he sits there and I pass by on my way to class. Hot Japanese Hair can brighten any day, if but for a moment J.

Today I froze my tushie off whilst valet parking. Being a native of the state affectionately known as “The Plywood State” (haha) I do not own a heavy, lined winter coat. I do have a long trench coat, and I was bundled up as best as I could. Unfortunately, the wind doesn’t care if you’re wearing a trench coat. To make matters worse, we were supposed to park the cars at the Albertson’s located down the hill and through a busy intersection. After parking 3 cars in that remote area, we gave up and used a strip-mall parking lot which was right across the street from our location. (I’m not sure why the PTB didn’t think of that) This meant we didn’t have to take a 3 minute walk, but we did have to play Frogger across a 6-lane divided road. Fortunately for us traffic wasn’t bad.

            Hail the first day of classes! 8:00 New Testament had several familiar faces, and the prof managed to use lots of big words. Hermeneutics directly afterwards was taught by an adorable old man and brings the promise of a 10-20 page paper. Ewww. After a special rehearsal tonight because our normal practice is canceled thanks to Rev. Martin Luther King, I will embark on a 4-day weekend.

            Today’s chapel was convocation, or, as I like to call it, conflagration. The different thing about today was that instead of wearing their caps with their gowns, they wore black Stetson hats. Once past the weirdness of a cowboy hat with academic robes, some of the faculty looked pretty good. Others (most notably those not native to the U.S.) looked like they felt a little silly wearing a cowboy hat. Otherwise it was fine and they still haven’t taught the men how to sit while wearing a dress (knees together). After chapel we got cake, and not just Publix sheet cake. It was amazing pound cake-like wonderfulness with raspberry goodness and real icing. It was for the centennial celebrations which will be going on this year, and if it keeps up like it started out, that means more free food!

I love Florida. While cold temperatures are not uncommon, we still freak out any time the thermometer dips below 60. Even though some people I know would call me a baby for saying so, its freaking cold today! Tonight there’s a freeze warning and all the news anchors are giving us tips on how to cope. Bundle up, bring tropical plants, pets and old people indoors. Yes, folks, you can’t leave Gramma outside tonight; she needs to be brought inside. Seriously, I think one news station did say something about keeping the elderly inside tonight. Compared to TX, yes, we are babies. But I’d rather be a warm baby than an adult-cicle,

I don't usually sit in sermons and say, "wow, that was for me." But yesterday in my OT class I did. I love my prof for that class and for the last 20 minutes or so Friday he just sort of preached to us. We had been talking about Abraham, and the prof pointed out that his willingness to sacrifice Isaac was so much more than just offering up his son. Everything that God had promised to Abram was wrapped up in Isaac. By asking for Isaac God was asking for everything He had told Abram He would do. I hadn't ever thought about it that way. But that wasn't the cool part :).

I guess you know that I have been struggling with God's will (finding/doing it) for what seems like years. I had sort of gotten to the point where I was just like, OK, I'm just going to have to trust God day by day. But my prof said something that hit me. He said, "my God is bigger than my decisions." How arrogant of me to think that something I decided to do would mess God up! OK, maybe I'm not totally over being afraid one day God's going to throw His hands up in aggrivation with me and leave, but to hold fast to my God being bigger than the things I do, that He will accomplish His will despite me, that's pretty good stuff.

A friend loaned me a Rich Mullins DVD so I could see the "Screen Door on a Submarine" bit with the cups. (remember the cup game girls?) This song was on it as well. I've heard it on the radio and loved it every time. I don;t usually post other people's stuff on my site but this song just seemed to echo my heartbeat where I am at in life right now. It's Rich Mullins' "Hold Me Jesus."

Well, sometimes my life
Just don't make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small

CHORUS:
So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It's so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart

CHORUS

Surrender don't come natural to me
I'd rather fight You for something
I don't really want
Than to take what You give that I need
And I've beat my head against so many walls
Now I'm falling down, I'm falling on my knees

And this Salvation Army band
Is playing this hymn
And Your grace rings out so deep
It makes my resistance seem so thin

CHORUS

You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

I wasn't planning on working this semester, but not making any money and watching my savings die a slow and painful death (exaggerating a little) is stressing me out. So I went to the bistro that my friend is working at to see if they could hire me as a server. I'm going to start training tomorrow, so I guess we'll see. It just opened and there's only a couple of servers and its pretty small, but that should be ok. The only bad thing (besides acutally having to work and not being able to do whatever I want when I want) is that Swing Night is Tuesday nights and that's one of the only nights I can work. :( I really did not set my schedule up so I would have a good availability to work. I guess I can quit if it doesn;t work out, but I sort of hate to do that to a new store.

Anyways... The weather's turned cool. Its kind of nice. Probably mis 70's in the morning, then into the 80's.

Hello people, I’ve finally gotten my internet back on. The past few weekends have been fun, but now its as if I’m staring at the stretch and it goes on forever. I am not sure of decisions I have to make. I want a job because using my savings is stressing me out J. I feel like this is where I am supposed to be now, but I’m not sure about later. I don’t know if I am to stay here and study, or what I should study, or study elsewhere, or go home. I don’t want to give up because its hard, but I don’t want to force something if its not what God’s will is for me.

 I know what I want ultimately. I seem to want it more now than ever, but I wonder if that’s become an idol to me. I have to be willing to give that up if that’s what God wants. But its scary to even be willing to give up something that you’ve always thought would be your life. To even say “that’s ok God, if that’s your will that’s what I want.” God places desires in your heart, but how do you know if those desires are from God or simply you trying to take your life into your own hands. What if I don’t like God’s plan? Why can’t I be content here?

I have been so blessed. I have had opportunities that I have learned from and grown from. I have made mistakes that I guess I have learned from. I have a supportive, Christian family and extended family. I have so much to be thankful for. Why am I always looking for the next best thing?

If you read this, say a prayer for me. Pray for guidance, that God would be clear and that I would know His voice. Pray that I will be able to rest in Him and not try to force my own agenda. Pray that I will be able to be a blessing to the women in the dorm. Pray for the people I come in contact with. We are all hurting in some way, but God has the answers. But we have to be willing to accept what He puts in front of us.

As of today I am seriously loving my Old Testament class. I am sure there will probably be wailing and gnashing of teeth when the first paper/test come due, but for now, I love it. Today’s lecture was about different views about how the Bible was inspired, and then implications of those views. There’s apparently something called that Chicago Statement of Inerrancy which I should take a look at, and have you ever heard of the “plenary umbrella.” I think they really like that word here; my large group session for chapel is called “plenary session.” I had never heard the word before I got here. I just think it is totally cool to be learning about the Bible like this. It goes way deeper than Sunday morning ever could. The book I’m reading for OT is almost over my heard, and I have a ton of marks in it, especially in the beginning, with questions I have. Ya’ll should all read it though. Its called The Faith of Israel: A Theological Survey of the Old Testament. I know, a bit long-winded isn’t it? One of my counseling books that’s really good is The counsel of Heaven n Earth, and it’s a much easier read (thank God!). I’m wondering if I’m going to stay in counseling thought. I’m really feeling that that is not my calling. I was thinking more along the lines of student ministry (I loved my middle schoolers) but I’m not sure if it’s a get involved in a ministry sort of thing or actually get a degree in it. Oh, well, I know that for now I’m in the right place.

I got an early birthday gift from one of my new friends; a cute, singe-serve French press that you can drink out of and a bag of coffee. Apparently I should have been working at Starbucks because they get a free bag of coffee a week and insurance benefits starting at 20/week. They might be taking over the world, but I’m not above a free handout. Just in case ya’ll forget though, my birthday is Friday! I’m feeling optimistic about it. I was a little afraid it would top last year for Worst Birthday Ever (which wasn't horrid), but I don’t think it will. J

Having never had to choose a church to attend before, I have now come to the conclusion that I hate church shopping. Its too bad they only meet once a week because its hard to decide if that’s the one for you from only Sunday School and the service. I feel like I have to throw myself into service and attendance with a church before I will know if that is the right one.

 My first Sunday I went to a “Cowboy church.” It was nice, but far away and not really what I was looking for in church setup (not to mention repeated too few praise choruses too many times) so I know I wouldn’t be back there.

 Last Sunday I went to a local Baptist church which had been recommended by a prof at the school. I went to Sunday School (yay) and it was pretty good. The singles group was a pretty good size and they were nice, if a little older than me it seemed. The church service was fine, again, very nice people, but the minister of music was waaay to dramatic. We sang “When I survey” but in between each verse (minor key the whole way through) he gave this little scriped talk while accompanied by music. I feel it definitely merits a second chance to see if that was normal or just special for that Sunday. I believe they do meet and a church on Sunday night for a Bible study, but I’m not sure if the singles do. Another hard part about that church is they do an early “contemporary” service (which I disagree with for so many different reasons) and a later “traditional” service. Most of the singles go to the early service, so that rules out me hanging out with them.

One cool observation was a guy dressed up in neatly starched and ironed white dress shirt, dress pants, and scuffed cowboy boots. I just thought it was cute. He dresses up for God’s house, but these are his real, working-man boots, not just the shiny ones he wears for special occasions. It would have ruined it if he had been wearing jeans; the dress-up and then the dirty boots were just (as my roommate would say) precious J.